13 August 2009

Follow Up appt

Today was baby's followup appt to his 2week baby well check up appt (or whatever it's called). They wanted to see him again because by 2weeks he still wasn't back to his birth weight (he was 7lb7oz). Well today, he was 8lb9oz (without clothes/diaper) and 21 inches! He is definitely gaining some weight (thanks to formula), because as you might remember he was 7lb15oz on Monday with the lactation lady. The doctor asked me about my milk and all this stuff. I happened to mention something about my surgery coming up (which is moved to Oct 16th) and my biopsy that was during the final weeks of pregnancy. He had this lightbulb look and was like, "well that's why your milk hasn't come in!" He says that because of this added stress it's preventing my milk from fully coming in (hence not being a dairy cow). Which I guess was his way of comforting me and saying nothing is wrong with me, physically. At least he didn't say, "Just stop stressing." That would have made me mad. Speaking of milk, I ordered the "permanent" supplemental nursing system from amazon. I enjoy using the "temporary one" (made to last 24hrs, ha! been using mine for a week) now that I'm not so stressed about my milk coming in...and I think the permanent one will help me feel like I'm still bonding with baby, even if I am not providing his main nutrition. I tried calling Tripler lactation to see if they had any, I left a message but she didn't call me back today, and I'm impatient. Besides, if they have it, I can always return it.

But he did make me realize, and confront the fact that I'm worried about upcoming things. I'm worried about being able to pump enough at work to help keep up the milk supply I do have. I'll be training in a new position that requires me to pretty much always know what's going on in all positions, and I'm not sure if I'll be able to leave every 3-4hrs to pump for 15-30min as needed. I'm worried about my surgery. At first I wasn't, I was like, okay whatever. Then he told me about staying overnight. THEN I looked up "Ameloblastoma" on the net and found people's blogs... and I think that made me even more nervous. My face is gonna be messed up after surgery (I mean, they say I'll be fine, but I think they mean after after all the healing and stuff). Which, ok I'm not too vain I don't think, but it was more, HOLY SMOKES this is a big deal. This is gonna hurt. This is not some easy peasy thing. And of course worried about after my surgery, when baby is not with me, and I'm in that few days of fog with pain medicines, what it will be like trying to pump (and dump) what milk I can... while I'm so foggy. You think I can ask the nurses to pump me? :P haha, if Dr Elyassi was here, he'd say, "keep up that sense of humor." At first I didn't know what that meant... now I understand. Check out this guy's blog... and you'll know what I'm talking about.

So that's my update. Now I'm going to shower because I feel gross... and rest. Tomorrow Sarah comes to visit (and Zeke can see his girlfriend Scarlett :P) and... I should work out tomorrow. Didn't today or yesterday...

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